I made a decision and Lent

After weeks of up and down and just getting more and more frustrated I finally made a decision.  Some might not think this is the best decision but this is my life and I am the one that has to live it.  I have been thinking about this for a while now.  I didn't come to this decision on my own.  I talked to my husband and my mom and a great friend about it and they all felt that with a second opinion if I wanted to go down this path that it made sense. 

The last time I lost most of my weight I used an appetite suppressant called phentermine.  It worked great but I still had to watch what I ate and exercise.  And Boy did I exercise!  I was running 5K's in under 40 mins.  I felt the best I had felt in a long time.  I was eating healthy and drinking tons of water.  I had really changed my life around.  Then I got pregnant and well we all know what my pregnancy with Lacee was like and I ended up slipping right back into old patterns.  I truly believe that if I had a normal pregnancy with much less stress that I could have maintained my healthy lifestyle.  There were some medical reasons I gained more weight but there was definitely some major stress factors that contributed. 

After having Lacee I was working hard at losing the weight again.  I did phentermine again and it worked great but I didn't work like I did before.  I didn't change my eating habits like I should and exercise like I should.  I didn't change my life and when I stopped taking it I stopped trying.  I ate what I wanted and didn't do any exercise.  I just quit.  And I gained back almost all that I lost.  Between crazy family stuff, holidays and Chad losing his job and then finding one where he was working 70 hours a week and I became for the most part a single mom.  I preferred getting fast food than cooking because it was less to clean up when I had to get both girls a bath and get them in bed.  I didn't have time to clean too.   Please don't think these are excuses because they aren't.  They are just reasons why I made the choices I made.

So back to the decision that I made.  After getting a second opinion I am now taking the phentermine again. I am also doing weight watchers.  I am still following the entire weight watchers plan with points and tracking.  I will be continuing that even after I stop taking the medication.  I am hoping to only take the medication for 1 round which is 4 months.  This should get me over the hump because all I do is think about food and 99% of the time I am hungry when I am thinking about the food.  I am tried of obsessing about food. My plan might blow up in my face but I am willing to take a chance and see what happens. 

Today is the start of Lent.  I went to Ash Wednesday Service tonight and my UMW group provided a meal for those in attendance.  It was a good night.  I still haven't decided what I want to give up for Lent.  I really want to give up something of significance but I am not sure what that would be.  I would love to make it something like giving up not exercising.  I am not sure if that is an option or not but I think making sure to move for at least 30 mins the next 40 days could be great but I am not sure if this is the sacrifice that they are intending.  So I guess that is my plan ... I am going to give up NOT exercising! 

I am not sure about these blogs and how much they are really helping me ... I keep doing them because I am hoping they are a going to be an outlet for me but sometimes I am not so sure.